The year that was 2020.

Oh what a year!

From the get go , 2020 felt like it was destined to be extraordinary. There is something about the symmetry found in the numbers two zero, two zero that always made me think of some post-apocalyptic dystopian Mad Max type scenario.

Wait wasn’t Mad Max set in 2021! Oh boy this could escalate very quickly indeed.

Still as 2019 faded out and signalled the end of an era for so many, the majority of us approached twenty, twenty with the bold optimism of a first time gym visitor enroute to a weigh in at the local community centre.

In my household we had just said “good bye for now” to my father who passed away in the summer of 2019 and the Christmas and New Year that year was the first I had, had to face as the genuine head patriarch of the Faulder name.

2020 was to be me leading the pack. Young Simba stepping out of Mufasa’s shadow. January 1^st 2020. I was ready to roar.

To say that the year two thousand and twenty stifled my initial lions roar to a much more domestic cats meow would be an understatement. As I metaphorically drew in breath and allowed it to fill my lungs to capacity in preparation to expel my forceful declaration that I was now the King, Covid 19 made it’s presence known.

The rumours of the virus that started in Wuhan china first surfaced in early December 2019. Like most, I paid little attention to it as I was focused on Christmas and the New year. Besides when taking over from the previous king a man such as myself needs to make an entrance. In my mind to take over from where Tom Faulder left of was as symbolic an appointment as when T’challa took on the mantel of the Black Panther in Marvel’s “Winter soldier”. The fact that a province in Asia was experiencing an outbreak of a virus was of little consequence or significance to me.

You see I remember the Ebola outbreak in west Africa 2014-2016 that killed over 11,000 people. It resurfaced in 2018 but due to the fact that they were still working on the vaccine for the original outbreak they were able to react quickly and stop the epidemic becoming a global pandemic. So for me it was a similar situation.

How wrong I was.

As the paranoia began to grip the nation, those who pay attention to world affairs began to see the potential threat to life as we knew it as early as the middle of January. The news coverage began to feature longer reports on the virus. On the 13^th January the first Covid case outside of China is reported in Thailand.

World health officials scrambled to offer input and co-develop a strategic response to the virus which at this point was being reported by the World Health Organisation as a figure of 7818 confirmed cases worldwide  the majority of which were still in China. A further 82 confirmed cases were also reported in another 18 countries outside of China. We were still in January!

Still the government are not panicking so I guess they have it under control. I will therefore delay my coronation as the newly crowned head of the Faulder household until February 2020. This will still be early enough in the year to have the dramatic impact that would herald the arrival of a man of great importance even if only in my own semi detached dwelling in the heart of blighty. Silver lining though. my third eldest or second youngest son has a birthday in January so we could concentrate on his birthday and continue with our very busy lifestyles.

 Up at the crack of dawn battling traffic along with everyone else who mistakenly believes that that hitting the road early means less traffic. Stop at the service station for overpriced flavoured coffee that I don’t tell the wife I buy each morning as she will lecture me on the benefits of using the travel mug she has recently brought me for my birthday. The truth is it is in the boot of the car and  I can’t be bothered to get it out, wash it, and make a coffee at home and repeat the process each and every bloody morning! (rant over) can we keep that one between us as I still get the odd overpriced store brought beverage.

Besides in the first week of February I have the wife’s birthday to consider. I know what your thinking…poor sod. He’s only just got Christmas out the way and has had to fork out for two birthdays! Yes I know ! but relax I guess this is all in the day to day duties of a sovereign king in waiting such as I.

Still I had a brief trip to the shops which seemed a little more packed then they did before Christmas. I got a few gifts including a plane ticket to visit family in Canada and fixed a smug smile on my face  with the calm assurance of a man who has knocked this birthday out the park. Over kill? The voice in my head playing an Italian Job soundbite “you were only supposed to blow the bloody doors off”! maybe so, but knowing that the perfect gift for a wife who is about to finish a social work degree is time away from you and the kids. Priceless.

I digress.

In February Covid 19 began to tighten it’s grip on the world and now Europe was begining to report increasingly high figures. The first cases reported were in France swiftly followed by Germany around the 24^th January 2020. Both cases had connections with recent visits to China as reported by the European centre for disease prevention and control.

By February 22^nd  2020 more and more cases where now being reported with Italy reporting several clusters of cases in various regions of Italy.   

We are now in the last week of February and we are gearing up for yet another birthday in the Faulder household.

Ok the dramatic Black Pantheresque , fan fair punctuating the unveiling of me is not going to happen in February. There will be no bevy of  beautiful African warrior women lining up atop of a sacred waterfall adorned mountain. Nobody urging me to display a ceremonial show of strength to prove my suitability for the title of king. None of my adoring subjects are to sprinkle flower petals at my feet to proclaim the presence of royalty. At least not in Birmingham, at least not in February. The second eldest son’s birthday looms large on the horizon.

Again I venture out to the shops. Again it is very busy. Toilet roll has begun to be seen as a new type of currency reminiscent of cigarettes out on the yard in the Sharwshank Redemption. Seriously this is starting to feel very real. I briefly consider producing my own underground supply of hand sanitiser, masks and toilet roll. Think of the bootleg liquor trade brought down by Elliot Ness in the 90’s gangster flick “The untouchables”. No the government are beginning to discuss restrictions and lockdowns. There is no time become the Andrex  Al Capone.

Think Cliff, think. How does a king react in times like this?

I reach for my phone and begin to scroll for dad’s number.

Wait…..

Cliff he’s not here.

It’s up to you to lead.

But what about the theme music? The slow motion walking entrance with onlookers gasping and slow clapping as I come into view. How will people know I am leading my household now? Arrrrgh!

Question?

If a man leads and no one is there to witness it, has he still led?

Second eldest son birthday passes without too much incident but is tinged with anxiety and a hint of conflict.

I am in full leadership role now. Being a King will have to flipping wait!

I have children. My four boys who have varying levels of consciousness in relation to the global pandemic that has engulfed the planet.

Early March and I have my four sons acting out their personalities under the stage light of the new Covid 19 world paradigm. On one hand we have the youngest child who can be found praying fervently for school closure as he’d prefer to stay home and play Rocket league. Second youngest son, has become the ever depressing narrative voice of impending doom. Each morning I am greeted with the latest stats and the diminishing chances of survival. This one has literally no filter.

Second eldest can intellectually explain the dangers of the pandemic but buoyed by youthful exuberance doesn’t think that the Pandemic will get to him. You see he has to get a hair cut to look fresh as there is a party to go to after he and da mans dem scooter down to a local music studio. I think my response was “ Chile nuh bodda mi an guh sid dun”! which if I translate into English means “young sweet child of my loins, please do not bring botheration to me amidst such unprecedented times. I urge you to take a seat and reconsider your plans”.

So onto my eldest and first born son. It’s his birth day on the 25.3.20 he is a one hundred percent millennium child. He is due to leave his teen years and this milestone feels monumental. Maybe he feels like I did at that age. I was aware that one day I would be the leader of the household as the elder tribes man. I felt  I possessed the number two headband as in the classic anime Afro Samurai , cue soundbite “Afrooooooo”! 

So where is my eldest. Upstairs. He isolated from the world. He rarely left his room, he spoke less and less. His birthday came and went. We couldn’t celebrate it as we had planned as the country had officially went into lock down on the 23^rd March 2020. The house was quiet.

I was worried about him, and as every leader or king will surly know, when the going gets tough the tough turn to their queens.

The wife did what she does. She used the wisdom passed to her by her first generation Jamaican parent and , grandparents , aunts and uncles. She gathered the family and began to use traditional foods and juices to boost immune systems and give confidence to myself and our children. The nourishment she provides on a day to day basis was part of the plan to survive life irrespective of the global pandemic she sought to build us up using the food that the ground provided.

Maybe great kings and leaders are never more than half the story of a successful partnership.

With this I ventured out for a walk with my 20 year old. He talked and I listened. We talked of life and love. We discussed the past , present and the uncertain future. We discussed that the world had changed little for Black people and that the global pandemic was still not seen as the biggest killer of Black people, racism is.

We spoke of how weird it was to see people frown at Black people if they could see to much of our face as opposed to that very thing three months prior would be met with suspicion and would likely have security guards following you around shops. Hoods and bandanas used to have police slowing their cars to  a crawl to stare down young Black boys walking around the park or riding their bikes. Now not covering your face was much more likely to get you stopped.

Stranger still.

Three or four months before the first UK lockdown, some people would reveal their bias by visibly keeping their distance from Black people in social settings. Now this was a government directive issued to everybody in respect of everybody.

Wow. Times certainly have changed.

Me an my boy put the world to rights. He was ok. I was ok. We were ok.

And so the world continued. Scared and vulnerable we took tentative steps into the unknown.

Disturbing footage emerged of vicious attacks on Black families in parts of Asia who were now wondering the streets homeless having been kicked out of their accommodation in a bazaar reaction to the Covid 19 outbreak.

It would seem that Covid can stop terrorism as I have seen little reports of terrorist activity since the outbreak but it apparently can’t stop racism. Even at a time when our very existence is being threatened people still found time to display racial hatred. Come on people lets do better.

The days turned into weeks and the long drawn out weeks became repetitive anxiety filled months. I watched as my household battled to remain sain.

For my  wife and I,  our life’s as keyworkers continued, all the while trying to manage being home school teachers and councillors. Not easy.

As we began to adjust to the new normal, May time rolled around. There was mutterings of a new football season. Liverpool fc looked increasingly likely to lift the premier league trophy which lets face it was never in doubt, and then on the 25^th of may 2020. It happened.

George Floyd was murdered, in cold blood by the murderer masquerading as an officer of the law , Derek Chauvin. Video footage ricocheted around the globe as fast as the viral pandemic. Phone alerts chimed and people hit the share button as though their lives depended on it. Maybe it did.

But for George Floyd, 8 minutes and 46 seconds of violence was all it took to kill somebodies baby. 8 minutes and 46 seconds was all it took to kill a little girls daddy. 8 minutes and 46 seconds was all it took to extinguish the life force of an man,  handcuffed and frog marched to his place of death. His place of public execution. A Minneapolis side walk in front of people who videoed him plead for his life, cry for his mother and gasp his last gasp. He could not breathe.

In the Faulder household we watched the footage. Unconsciously as a watched the footage I stopped breathing. Tears welled up in my eyes and began to fall. I looked to my wife and then to my children. Quiet, stunned ,silent.

They said nothing. I said nothing. Then the little one spoke.

“Dad what’s happening? Why did they do that? Is he dead”?

I was still trying to fathom the first question when the next eldest spoke.

“It’s because the police hate Black people”! “Can’t you see that”?.

Honestly I wanted to correct them and offer some adult like rationale. Something that would make sense to children and maintain their faith in mankind.

Previously I had barely been able to find the words to explain the racism that saw the brother Ahmaud Arbery slain by two racist vigilantes in Georgia for jogging 3 months and 2 days prior, or the brutal murder of Breonna Taylor in Louisville, Kentucky who’s body was left riddled with bullets by police as she lay in her bed asleep.

When asked if this was something that just happened in America I chose to answer with the reality that in 2020 in England the case of William Cameron’s death was being investigated as he had arrived at the police station unconscious and later died. This is not the first case of this type of incident remember Darren Cumberbatch from Coventry a year before. Maybe this is why George Floyd’s death was felt so keenly here in England too.

That summer the Wife and I attended marches and showed our support. Our organisation went through a rebranding as it joined the Martin James Network where we found more support in our quest to innovate and change the world.

Comrades like Wayne Reid of BASWA and Joel Blake of the Birmingham Chamber of Commerce and Peter Jones of Ordinary people inspired us to dig deep. Allies like Alicia Drummond of Teen Tips emerged and helped us reach more people.

But back to the task at hand. What do I say to my children?

Think Cliff , think! This is the time for leadership. King step the hell up!

The words I spoke that day were not particularly eloquent but I meant every word.

“ As you know we as a family have always lived by the code that we respect those who respect us and we stay true to who we are at all costs”. Professionally I have spent the last 25 years raising the awareness of racial inequality and trying to persuade the powers that be that radical change is necessary if we are to avoid something of a civil war.

We honour the struggle for justice with all we do and we show our class at every opportunity. But believe me when I tell you that this is the most serious time in history and we are all privileged to be right here , right now.

This is where we get to choose what the history books say about us when they open the pages in years to come.

We are not afraid of the virus because racism is a bigger threat to black people and we must fight for our lives in this moment.  We must identify allies and seek to re-educate or break the systematic chains that allow a police officer to murder a man by casually kneeling on his neck until he dies in front of the watching world.

I promise you this we will step up the fight and double , then triple our efforts. We will move from a position of local resistance to the catalyst for global change.

As the CEO of AboutFace but more importantly as your dad. I promise you this.

We will create a fearless race.

I will fight racism with every ounce of strength I have.

Our Journey did not start with you George Floyd but of many people it did. Your death has allowed so many to finally understand that racism is a problem of global significance.

Many things happened in 2020. Brexit and Trumps many meltdowns before loosing the presidency to name but a few.

But nothing impacted my world as the recognition of two global pandemics. The one that has spread affecting generations of people and left a trail of bodies in its wake in every corner of the globe. And the other one. Covid 19.   

Bless.

Cliff